God -- My Love Rival
God forgives my soul for saying this. But you are my love rival. My boyfriend loves you more than me, cares for you more than me, spends more time with you than me.
I laugh silently at this, but yes God I am jealous of you. And at times I am angry of you. Cos my boyfriend loves you more than me, cares for you more than me, spends more time with you than me...
My baptism day is coming and I am having second thoughts. My boyfriend says it's all about committment towards God. Am I committed towards you God? Did I sin when I questioned about spending time with you or my family? Was I wrong when I got pissed with my relatives for telling my Mum not to get the divorce cos they are Christians? Was it worse when the first thing that comes to my mind was what Gandi said ' I would have been Christians if not for Christians themselves'? God I have a thousand questions in my head.
But some things are for sure. God, I love you. I know you are watching over me. I know you forgives all my mistakes and still embraces me.
But Lord do you know my confusion? My jeaousy over you and my love for you...
I laugh silently at this, but yes God I am jealous of you. And at times I am angry of you. Cos my boyfriend loves you more than me, cares for you more than me, spends more time with you than me...
My baptism day is coming and I am having second thoughts. My boyfriend says it's all about committment towards God. Am I committed towards you God? Did I sin when I questioned about spending time with you or my family? Was I wrong when I got pissed with my relatives for telling my Mum not to get the divorce cos they are Christians? Was it worse when the first thing that comes to my mind was what Gandi said ' I would have been Christians if not for Christians themselves'? God I have a thousand questions in my head.
But some things are for sure. God, I love you. I know you are watching over me. I know you forgives all my mistakes and still embraces me.
But Lord do you know my confusion? My jeaousy over you and my love for you...
posted by Count your Blessings at 8:24 AM
4 Comments:
pat pat
Dong I got your internet banking access code and the bank web site is www.ocbc.com.sg.
oh ya. in case you can't find it,
it's under comments in the settings page where you normally type your blog.
and just in case this feels segmented, i've got another comment
elsewhere. haha.
Wow Adrian very deep... which comment? where? ...
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